I want to ask everyone — this happened and I’m not sure how I should have stood my ground or if I’m just overthinking it.

First time posting so sorry if I’m typing weird. I’m 38, have worked in office coordination at a small company in Phuket for almost seven years. Most coworkers are locals, with some seniors and others my age.

So this happened yesterday — boss sent an email at about 3:00 PM: “Pick up the file urgently, tweak it a little, and have a backup plan ready tonight.” No extra details. It felt super urgent and my heart dropped. I was shocked because this job needs to talk to the sponsor, set up payment systems, type the summary report, and coordinate the field team. Event is next Saturday.

I immediately started calling the team. Graphics team was tied up on another project and couldn’t fix the file right away. Finance said they needed to check the budget before signing. I explained and waited — waited about an hour and a half to two hours for answers. I was fidgeting with my charger and pen at my desk, hands a bit shaky.

When I reported to the boss, he walked in with a really sour face, walking fast, and said in front of the team, “This isn’t that hard, why isn’t it done yet?” in a really harsh tone. I tried to explain I’d called the team and was waiting for responses, and suddenly he said I wasn’t committed, I worked sloppily, I wasted time gossiping with others, and he brought up something from a few months ago even though he wasn’t directly supervising at that time... I was so shocked.

Some coworkers looked stunned, some were silent. I said that to finish tonight we’d have to cancel some things and asked permission to pull people from other units to help, but the boss ignored me and told me to do it myself, then ordered me to prepare the backup plan to present at 5:00 PM today — which was insanely soon. It required a lot of info including a new budget summary.

What hurt me was that a few minutes after yelling at me, he praised someone who’d been here six months as an example — “very fast” — and told that person to help me. The tone and implication were totally different. I felt belittled, even though I’ve run the behind-the-scenes many times and organized systems to make events run.

After the meeting he asked, “Will you take responsibility?” I said, “Yes, but please give me time and help coordinate with the relevant departments.” He replied briefly and left. It felt more like an order than problem-solving together. I couldn’t sleep, thought about it all night, put off dinner for an hour and a half because I had to prepare documents. I feel awful T_T

I’m not someone who sulks, but it felt disrespectful. Some people in the team have been pulled aside and scolded privately before, but he’s never been this harsh in public. The work is fixable, nothing major was ruined, but the process and words exhausted me.

I want to ask everyone — if this happened to you what would you do? Should I talk to the boss privately, or accept it and keep working like normal? Or should I record the incident and send it to HR (our HR is tiny and always slow)? Or should I ask for clarification in a meeting about what he expects and whether being reprimanded in front of the team is okay? Or am I overthinking and he was just stressed? I don’t know, he made me feel weird, right? haha

P.S. If anyone’s been through a boss like this and got past it, please give me honest advice. Really need it.