Hey, total newbie here. Typing from my phone at 1:30 a.m., eyes all sleepy, sorry if this is messy. I’m 35, from Udon Thani, run a small online shop selling plain clothes for regular market moms. Been with my boyfriend almost three years. We usually talk about work and life pretty casually, I guess.

Things started changing the past two months. He said he’s helping out someone’s business — just delivering stuff and dealing with a mechanic — but his behavior got weird. Coming home late a lot, saying he’s prepping for the morning market so needs to wake at 5. Sometimes he really does get up and deliver, but other nights he comes home at 10:30, calls me for a minute then puts his phone on silent. Super quiet, doesn’t open my stories, doesn’t read my LINE for hours, just says work is crazyyyy. I’m like huh?

The other day I was dropping off an order near the noodle shop at the soi entrance (the vendor wore a floral apron, I remember because she had a black metal hair clip) and was gonna top up his gas, so I grabbed his phone that was on the table to pay without thinking. On the screen there was a chat from a woman whose name I didn’t know with a message, “Can you bring this outfit to my house tomorrow?” with a pic of a small retail dress. I was like wait, what is this.

I called him and asked straight up who that was. He said it was a customer and then kinda complained back like, “Just a customer, why are you being so dramatic.” I asked to see the picture and he wouldn’t show me. He snatched his phone back and locked it, super cold. Said maybe I’m overthinking. I’m really confused.

There’s more. I’ve seen delivery receipts he keeps in the drawer with addresses in totally different areas than the usual customer — like another side of town — multiple times. And some messages I’ve seen in his story felt warmer than normal business talk, like “miss you” and “want to grab food?” That drives me so crazy because I run an online shop too and know how tiring it is. I’m not an extreme jealous person, but if the person he’s messaging is acting like that and he just says she’s a customer, of course I’m going to wonder.

I don’t know if I’m being pessimistic or if he’s just expanding his customer base and hiding things so I won’t worry. I feel kind of dismissed, like my feelings aren’t being taken seriously. I feel petty, hurt, and sometimes wonder if I’m overreacting or if I’d look like a terrible jealous girlfriend if I blew up.

I want to talk to him directly but I’m scared if I bring it up he’ll shut down or it will blow up into something big. Worst case I lose trust for no reason. So I’m thinking of collecting evidence for about a week (like seven days) to be sure before I ask, but it’s hard — my stomach is in knots all day.

What do you all think? Should I ask to talk and demand to see his phone right now, or let it be a business thing for now? T_T

P.S. OP is spacing out so much, really want advice. LOL