Last night we had a huge fight again. About an hour and a half. It started around 1:30 AM over the same money thing I thought we’d already settled, but it never ends. I’m 28, I sell a little stuff online in Udon Thani. I’ve been with him 3 years and we’re getting married in 3 months, but all these little things keep piling up and I’m scared we actually can live together.

Silent now.

Short version: he’s bad at paying on time. Some months he’ll leave the household bills we agreed on unpaid for days so I have to pay because I’m afraid the utilities will get cut. I’m not stingy, but...his sense of responsibility just seems unstable. And he has this habit of binge-buying online at night. Like last night I saw an order history at almost 2 AM, even though before bed he was sitting eating with a shared spoon and said he’d buy something for himself and pay it off later and he’d clear it up. When I asked about the family budget he said he forgot to log it or didn’t see my message. I was so confused lol.

Sometimes he’s a good person, really kind. But when it comes down to it, these small things stress me out so much that I start wondering if I’m being narrow-minded or overthinking. Or should I just accept it because once we’re married we’re one family? But if I let it slide I’m scared it’ll get worse. Sometimes I just stare at the pen on the table at 5 PM and replay everything in my head.

Typing on my phone so sorry if I miss stuff. I’ve tried bringing up our budget and planning together, like for half an hour, but in the end we back off and end up on different pages. He doesn’t like talking about financial details. I want him to feel like we’re partners, not like I’m nagging, but I don’t know how to start. I’ve told him again and again but it’s like he really doesn’t get it haha.

Friends who are married or anyone who’s been through this, what did you do? Should I postpone the wedding, or is there a way to talk so he understands without fighting? P.S. borrowing a friend’s login to post this.