So I just went through something that’s left me totally baffled and I need to ask you all about it.

I’m 35, freelance graphic designer and content creator, living in Udon Thani. I work from home and sometimes from cafés. I haven’t had a regular boss for almost two years, but before that I worked as a designer at a small company in Bangkok. I’ve known one of my old bosses for about seven years — he even taught me when I was starting out.

About a month ago he contacted me saying he had a small brand-communication project and wanted a reliable freelancer. Since we know each other he sent the job my way. We agreed a price and chatted casually that there would be two rounds of revisions, then final files and payment by bank transfer as agreed.

But once the work started, things changed bit by bit — the chat felt casual but he basically started giving orders on a whim. “Make the color a bit different,” “try several fonts,” but without defining the scope. He’d just say, “I want it to look good, the office team will review it,” and then one night at 10:45 PM he sent a long message listing tons of fixes and said he needed it by tomorrow morning. When I opened the request it turned out to be a completely different part of the project than what we’d agreed. I was so stunned I had to put my spotted coffee cup down and stare at my phone for almost five minutes.

Silent.

I get that clients can ask for revisions, but the way he acted was like I was a full-time staffer in the office who must drop everything and wait for orders. He didn’t care that I live in another province and already have other deadlines. He started calling weekly online meetings even though I’d already sent the files — and in those meetings he dug up old designs I made when I was an employee and compared them to the current work even though the contexts are different. It dragged on and on and made me feel unfairly judged. I politely said we needed to set revision limits and that I’d charge extra hourly for out-of-scope work. He said “don’t worry about it,” but his tone and demands increased, asking for unbelievable levels of detail.

Confusing.

The strangest thing was he wanted to show the pieces in the company presentation with credit to the team, but when I asked to put my name as lead designer he answered, “We only put names when it’s a big team.” What’s that about? I actually did the work — I’m not some middleman — or am I being petty? It felt off.

Another issue was the timing — sometimes he’d send work late and expect urgent fixes outside normal hours, then text “why isn’t it done yet” even though I’d already given a timeline. I started getting stressed and had nightmares about opening my laptop to my Line flooded with messages, and I found myself remembering being monitored at my old office job. So annoying.

Once I tried to be professional and suggested a clear queue and a small contract to sign before round two. He said he wasn’t comfortable and we’d discuss later. When it came time to pay, the transfer was nearly ten days late even though the work was done. I messaged several times and kept getting “I’ll transfer it” — finally an accounting system problem was the excuse. He knows freelancers need fast payment, but acted like I had no expenses. I’m exhausted T_T

I sometimes wonder if I’m setting my standards too high or if I’m just a complainer. When I tried to talk directly he reverted to his old attitude and didn’t really respect my professionalism. I’m so confused because he used to be the one who taught and supported me, but now it’s like he’s a different person. Am I overthinking this?

I’ve started setting clear written boundaries and charging for out-of-scope work. He agreed, kind of puzzled, and has been a little more cooperative, but it still doesn’t feel the same. It’s like being reminded I have to put up with the old commanding behavior, even though I chose freelance life. Why am I back feeling controlled?

Has anyone left full-time work and then had an ex-boss become a client? How did you handle this? Should I treat it purely as business — if they pay late, stop communicating — or am I being too sensitive? Shouldn’t he accept my standards? I want to keep my work and time standards. How do I stay professional without being bossed around?

Sorry if this is my first thread and I messed up anything.

P.S. If necessary I might end the working relationship with someone who helped me in the past, or maybe try a clearer conversation first — anyone with experience, please share. hahaha