Last night I picked up my boyfriend's phone to plug it in and a Line group I’d never seen before popped up from the corner of the screen. It pinged that this person is going drinking with him tonight, and then a story showed up — a deliberately artsy photo of beer and bread, like he posed it to look cool.

I went totally quiet. I don't usually feel this way, but my head started spinning and heating up at the same time haha. I'm 26, we've been together almost a year — not a kid anymore — but I'm so confused about my own feelings.

I freelance and work from home in central Bangkok, sometimes at cafes. He has a regular job outside the house. Lately he's been coming home late more often, not talking much, answering short when I ask stuff. And sometimes when I pick up his phone to try to be a little caring and start a conversation, he locks the screen quickly — which is weird, he didn't used to do that.

A couple nights before there were 2–3 messages from a strange number: funny stickers and "miss you". I felt crappy seeing it but didn't ask right away. I wondered if asking would even get a clear answer or if I was about to make a big deal out of a single message. I don't know.

On Saturday he had plans with friends, but when I finished work in the evening and wanted to invite him out to eat, he said he already had plans and added "we'll talk later." Then when I scrolled his story I saw the same photo that had popped up in that Line group. Whoa... same camera angle, same shirt. I was totally stunned. T_T

I'm not usually the jealous type or insecure, but there's this tiny voice in my head asking "are they really just friends?" or maybe it's just some casual secret thing. On the other hand, I also stalk coworkers' Facebook when I'm bored, so maybe I'm overthinking. Or maybe I’ve been quiet and the uncertainty has just grown.

I haven't talked to him directly yet. I'm scared it'll blow up into something huge that no one wants, but the suspicion is eating me. So I'm asking for advice: in a situation like this how should I talk to him to get a real answer without making him shut down? Or should I stay quiet and watch his behavior a bit longer?

Or am I just being paranoid? Should I confront him straight up? I'm worried about the classic "we're just friends" excuse with no clear connection behind it lol. This is really confusing.

OP here — please give me some advice, what do you think?

P.S. Before anyone says "check his phone," I'm not ready to wave the white flag like that. I'm afraid if I do, the relationship will change more than it already has.