Last night around 1:15 AM
I literally have the time stuck in my head: 01:15) my boyfriend sent a short story clip, like 3–4 minutes. I wasn't planning to open it then ‘cause I was about to sleep, but this morning when I watched it properly I felt my heart drop. I almost stopped breathing. It hurt. I’m so confused.

In the clip there’s a woman standing really close to him — like close enough to put a hand on his shoulder. I don’t know how to describe it, it wasn’t the kinda stance friends take when you bring someone home. It was... super close, honestly. And he tagged the location at a café in the area he told me he doesn’t usually go to. On the table there was a paper coffee cup and a red keychain. I’m 31, work at a factory in Bangkok, I do morning and evening shifts, finish around 18:30. I get home exhausted. I want clarity, but that night I just felt worse.

We’ve been together 2 years. We met at a food stall near the factory. He was sweet at first — sending food pics, funny clips, so I trusted him. After 8 months I started noticing things: he’d disappear late and say he was out with friends, but I’d see him online on Facebook at 23:12 and he wouldn’t reply to me. I’m not being irrationally jealous, but that story made things clearer than just “he was absent.”

I messaged straight away: “Who’s that?” He replied curtly, “An older colleague from my old job.” But his tone and the answer didn’t line up, like he was hiding something and trying to act normal. I asked when they met and why the location tag was there. He said they stopped to talk about work, but didn’t say who’s in the clip. I asked him to send another angle of the clip, he read it and didn’t reply. I felt awful, haha.

There were little signs before, like a female friend I hardly see clearly on social media, but he always said she’s a friend since high school. Yet I rarely saw photos together or serious meetups, only comments or stories that got deleted quickly so I couldn’t even remember them. I asked once if there’s anyone special he likes to talk to, he said no, but his answers were evasive. I try not to be possessive — I’ve worked in factories for 10 years, I know life gets busy — but tonight I really couldn’t take it.

This morning I waited to talk after work, but when we met he acted totally normal. Very normal. Answered briefly, “You want to talk?” I said I needed clarity about last night’s clip. He looked like he didn’t want it to blow up, but said, “Just a friend, really, we talked about work.” I pulled up old messages I’d seen. He said those were group messages, not private ones. I can’t fully believe it, but I also feel guilty for doubting because I want to give him a chance. He’s a good person sometimes, but I’m uneasy.

I even snooped through the woman’s Facebook
not proud of it). She posts a lot but rarely shows her face clearly, mostly event photos, dressed up. I found an old photo with a comment from my boyfriend months ago saying, “Come see me soon” with a heart emoji. I felt stabbed but not bleeding, like dying inside. My trust shook, but a tiny voice says maybe I’m overthinking, maybe they’re just close and caring.

I’m torn. I keep checking her stories even though I know it’s unhealthy. I can’t stop. It reinforces my insecurity every time he doesn’t show my face, deletes messages quickly, or watches that clip and laughs. I want to trust him and have things be chill again, but I worry I’m just the backup option. If he is secretly talking to someone, what would I do? How do I talk so he opens up without a huge fight? I’m exhausted from work, I can’t handle fighting every night.

Should I let go and watch his behavior for a month? Or if it’s still unclear should I break up? Or set rules like asking him not to message anyone privately who makes me suspicious, or ask him to be honest and say there’s no one more important than me? I don’t want to control him, but I’m tired of uncertainty. He’s said he loves me, but his actions make me doubt.

This is my first thread so sorry if I messed up. I’ll update later. What do you guys think I should do? T_T