Need some advice. I'll be straight — I'm really confused right now.

I'm 42, freelance in Bangkok. We've been together 4 years and married almost a year, but now there's a problem with my wife's spending habits.

It's not one big purchase and done, it's little by little. I've noticed for about 8 months that she orders online roughly twice a week. Mostly home decor stuff I didn't ask for, little things like laptop stickers, colorful pens, stuff like that. She usually tells me after or sometimes not at all. My savings that I planned to put toward paying wedding debt and a future shop project (I meant to start next year) have been disappearing.

I'm silent. Really confused.

I showed her my spreadsheet — detailed, line by line: monthly expenses, food, utilities, emergency fund. When I showed her the numbers she said she didn't think it was a big deal, just small series of purchases. She has friends who often invite her to buy, and she has a regular job so her income isn't as low as I thought, but our money management direction is just so different. I'm a planner, I write everything down, I have a spreadsheet, but sometimes I feel like she's a kid not ready to be responsible like an adult, or maybe I'm just overthinking.

We've talked several times but it ends in little fights and then silence. Sometimes we talk at 1 a.m. because I can't sleep, talk until dawn, finish at 5 a.m. with no conclusion. It's exhausting.

Another thing: my parents asked for some help, small support totaling about 10,000 baht a month, so I have to take some from my personal money. Freelance income is unstable — January had good work but February was quiet — so it's tough. I can't cover that every time. T_T

I don't want to make a drastic decision, but I'm afraid if I let this go it'll affect our future together. Should we make a real joint budget? Separate some accounts? Or if she doesn't change after talking, should I consider stopping or adjusting the relationship? Should I be strict or am I worrying too much? Anyone been through this, please share. haha

Sorry if this is messy, I'll update later, but right now I'm spaced out with the iced coffee in front of me, that little blue one. Should I go talk to her again?