I'm in Hua Hin.
Sorry if this is rambling, my mind's stuck on it and I gotta get it out 555

I'm 42, work as a nurse at a small clinic near the beach. Days are long — patients from morning till about four and I'm wiped. It's just the two of us at home. We dated for 7 years before marrying; we've been married 3 years. Life's mostly okay. We have a small house, split bills some months, wing it when needed. But yesterday I got blindsided by something.

Short version: Sunday evening, around five, I went into the wardrobe to grab a sweater and found a small wallet hidden at the back on the top shelf. It had a little blue plastic keychain on it. I pulled it out and inside were cash and a small envelope with a few transfer slips — looked like emergency medical savings and another chunk he'd been keeping to himself. He never told me. And it wasn’t small money, almost as much as I've saved. My heart dropped. I was totally stunned.

My feelings are all over the place. I laughed a dry laugh then went into a funk. I get people need privacy, but I like talking about money with my partner. We've counted the piggy bank together before; I thought I knew what he had. But this? Not a word. It made me feel like I'm not in the loop about parts of his life. He said he was saving for emergencies and didn’t think it was a big deal. Yeah…but why not mention it?

I'm not usually naggy about little things, but money ties into life decisions. If something urgent happens, we should decide together, not leave one person to shoulder it alone. And if we have a fight, will this blow up into something bigger? Or am I overthinking? I'm so confused. Sometimes I think he might fear I'll spend it recklessly, so he hid it. I tried to ask neutral questions but my inner voice panicked first and I felt a bit short of breath.

Also, he's had little secret-keeps before — like water bills he purposely didn’t tell me he'd already paid, or keeping small envelopes I assumed were old junk. I used to think that was quirky-cute, but now with money involved I worry what else he hasn’t told me. The stash might've been built for almost two years, I guess, but I only just saw it now.

I want to talk, but I'm scared it'll turn into drama. Am I being jealous or controlling? I don't want to dig everything up, but I also can't act like nothing happened. Should I wait for him to explain first or bring it up calmly and directly now? Will he handle it? Am I making a mountain out of a molehill? T_T

P.S. Sorry for not being concise. I'll update later.